mr. zilla goes to town

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

election wrap

For me elections are a bit like a line of coke as long as a baby's arm. Kind of jolly good fun conceptually, but the evidence of the last attempts at it (Canberra, Washington) is starting to suggest that when you keep waking up in hospital the next day, screaming about what's been inflicted on (and by) the body politic, it might be time to give the game away and outsource the whole ruling business to some Platonian philosopher kings. John Ralston Saul is Consort to the Canadian Governor-General Adrienne Clarkson and I'm sure that's no small coincidence it seems to be one of the sanest nations on the planet at the moment.

Anyway the point is that I'm an absolute political junkie and yet its taken me until two minutes before election day here to get around to mentioning the UK election on the blog. That should give you some idea about the general level of interest and engagement in the election. Despite a bit of hoohah in the last week about formal legal advice on entering into the Iraq War, Labour have firmed from odds of twelve-to-one on to win about a month ago to the ridiculous rate of thirty three to one ON to win the election. It's a pretty damn sure bet but with three quid back from every hundred you lay down its almost not worth leaving the house, let alone leaving the house to vote!

That said there are one or two interesting contests about. In a contest not dissimilar to Andrew Wilkie's run against little John, the former British Ambassador to Uzbekistan Craig Murray is running against Foreign Minister Jack Straw in Blackburn, have a gander at this interview to get an inkling why:
So [my deputy] went and saw the CIA head of station in Tashkent, and this was in November 2002, and said to him, “Look, my ambassador’s worried that the intelligence you’re passing on to MI6 is probably obtained under torture, and he wants your take on whether this is possible”. And she reported back to me, absolutely no reason to disbelieve her, the CIA head of station Tashkent said: “You’re right, it will be obtained under torture. But, we don’t see that as a problem.”

While Tony and Gordon's Labour party have perhaps a 3-6% lead in the polls give or take, this translates into a fairly hefty 90 seat majority if it all plays out this way. The Liberal Democrats -- a genuine third force party that the asshat Australian Democrats should and could still have been if they hadn't forgotten to pack a few spare watercress sandwiches before fighting over the control yoke and crashing into a mountaintop in The Andes -- will probably make some net gain; however as this will be more at the expense of Labour than the Tories its not much to get excited about except that it demonstrates the extent of the progressive consensus that exists in this country to an extent unthinkable in both the US and Australia. (The current wunderkid of the Tories is an openly gay young chap who has had the Conservative leader out doorknocking in his electorate. Can you see the libs or the ALP preselecting anyone similar in Australia? Shit, can you see the ALP preselecting a red blooded country-born train driver like Ben Chifley unless he was the secretary of the union? Tch.)

In the interests of democratic hygiene I would love to see the government that misled this country into a terrible war of choice cleansed from power. In the interests of keeping the dog-whistling, race-baiting, "are you thinking what I'm thinking?" two-faced tories out of power, I have to say I'll be glad to see them returned.


  • Absolutely legendary.

    Incidentally, my local Tory candidate came to my door the other day and said to me, "Are you thinking what we're thinking?"

    I said, "I don't know. Are you thinking, "I'd quite like to make a necklace out of the vaginas of all the female contestants on that new ITV celebrity wrestling programme....apart from Annabelle Croft. And in place of her vagina I would like to include the penis of James Hewitt as a kind of pendant?"

    And he said, " no, we're not thinking that."

    I said, "That's a shame, because I would vote for anyone who was thinking that."

    And he said, "Really.... well, we were thinking that a bit."

    I think that says all you need to know about the Tory party.

    By Blogger The Capgras Delusion, at 7:56 pm  

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